1 hour ago
Friday, October 08, 2010
Posted by Mojo at 5:00 AM
Quick, before this bit blows itself out. A tornado is one of nature's most powerful and destructive forces. Winds inside a tornado can reach 300 mph or more, making even a Category 5 hurricane look like an April shower. If a tornado is sighted near you, you should seek cover immediately in an interior room on the ground floor staying away from windows and remain under cover until the danger has passed.
Someone forgot to tell these two Darwin Award contenders who seemed to be bent on making the short film "A Tree Blows In Brooklyn". This might be forgivable if the entire dialog hadn't consisted of "Dude! Oh My G*d!" and "Dude looks at this!", "Dude a f***ing tornado for sure!", "Holy sh**!" and... "Dude!" repeated ad nauseum. The one saving moment of the film was that the destruction of the tree was rather impressive. But the handling of the subject matter was wholly uninspired.
Enter the Gregory Brothers to the rescue, making this whole train wreck slightly palatable with the autotuned version. But even the brilliance of Schmoyoho can only do so much for these morons who aren't even as bright as the neighborhood dog. And it might be contended that without the Gregory's help, these two would have vanished down the rabbit hole of obscurity they should have. Whatever.
Probably conceived by the same folks who brought us the Mentos/Diet Coke Rocket, this video is more of a public service than its creators even realize. If this technique can be perfected, it could not only rid the world of those insidious Gummi Bears (and worms and fish and whatever-the-hell-else they've gummed up) but it could also give us an alternative energy policy that could drastically reduce our dependence on foreign oil -- or just oil in general. After all, if sugar can hyper power a kid, just imagine what it could do for a car.
See, this is what's wrong with television today. Richard Dawson would have smoothed right on over this. Seriously.
Sorry Steve, he would've.
Wait. What? Never mind the arguments of genetics, environment, choice and what have you. The latest tinfoil-hat theory to come out of Grumman's Theater of the Absurd has finally answered the question "What makes some people gay?" (What it doesn't address, of course, is why this question is still a question that apparently needs answering.) Whatever. Let's see the Gregory Brothers do something with this one.
On second thought...
The colors are totally in the wrong order! It should be Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo and Violet. Remember 5th grade science class? Roy G. Biv? Ring a bell?
And with that I bid you ... Happy Friday!